Using a Private Investigator in Your Divorce Case

"Information is a very valuable commodity. Ensuring that your attorney has as much information as necessary is essential to him/her effectively representing you. That information is sometimes difficult to notice simply from reviews of bank statements, phone bills or from other discovery methods. If your spouse is attempting to hide essential facts from the court, it is very unlikely that a Perry Mason moment will occur and they will blurt out the truth during their testimony."

To read the entire article, follow this link: http://www.mcneillawnc.com/private-investigators-in-family-law-cases

North Carolina's defense of marriage?!

As a divorce attorney, it is fairly humorous [in a 'what the heck'-kind of way] when certain members of our community and legislature spend so much State money, taxpayer money, on issues like whether North Carolina should have a Constitutional Amendment banning gay marriage. I, for one, think it is an incredible waste of time, resources and energy that could be better used elsewhere....like helping create jobs for North Carolina citizens, gay, straight, not so gay, not so straight, whomever...

Never mind the fact that straight people have so screwed up any "sanctity" that marriage may have that our Court system is chock full of folks willing to fight over pots and pans. And I am quite sure that many, many of our Legislators have violated their prior wedding vows, are divorced, have had premarital relations and a slew of other things [like eating shellfish] which are punishable by death on either the Old or New Testaments. It is pure and simple political gamesmanship to decide to push such an issue this political season. And I also fault the prior leadership [Democrats] for not having the political and intestinal fortitude to address this issue long ago and permit same sex marriage....if marriage is a contract between two consenting adults, surely two guys can make a good a decision as an 18 year old opposite sex couple.

Instead, our Legislators came back from a vacation to "work" for three days so they could all jump on the anti-gay bandwagon and prove that they don't like gay people marrying.

Regardless of one's personal or religious beliefs about the issue, isn't it time that our Legislators worked FOR us and not AGAINST some portion of us? The only thing it proves to me is that our Legislators have nothing better to do than jump onto divisive issues because real issues might take some serious effort and thought to resolve. Yea, North Carolina....working hard to return us back to the 1800's. Good job!

In the meantime, folks who are not married either because of State-sponsored prohibitions or because they have decided that the State-imposed laws regarding marital dissolution are too cumbersome, need to seriously consider entering into a contract that determines how things are going to be, both before, during and in the event the relationship should end. There is no sense in working hard toward a partnership and having the law or your partner completely vacate those actions and decisions. Give me a call or visit our website for more information: www.mcneillawnc.com

Make sure you know what you are signing!!! Consent Orders can not be fought based on the contract defense of unconscionability

Parties seeking to Yurek, the Court of Appeals affirmed that attempts to "...set aside a consent judgment are limited to proving lack of consent, fraud, mutual mistake, or unilateral mistake under some
misconduct." Yurek v. Shaffer, ___ N.C. App. ___, ___, 678 S.E.2d 738, 746 (2009).

So, make sure you read CAREFULLY whatever your spouse, ex-spouse, your attorney or his/her attorney put in front of you to sign. It is going to be REALLY hard to break out of that deal once it is entered.

Sometimes the most difficult reality of divorce is telling your parents you are getting a divorce.

 As most folks know, telling your kids about your pending divorce of separation is difficult. This article explores the reality and solutions for explaining to your parents why you are getting a divorce as well. There is not good way to tell them, unless they completely hate your spouse, but there are better ways to tell them than others. The decisions that lead to the end of a relationship are more than likely a multitude of reasons; how to convey those reasons does not need to be so complicated.


http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1019886/how_to_tell_your_parents_you_are_getting.html?cat=7

Observing the baby?

Observing the baby one night a wife found her husband standing over their baby's crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, scepticism.

Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arm around her husband. "A penny for your thoughts," she said.

"It's amazing!" he replied. "I just can't see how anybody can make a crib like that for only $46.50."

Should a man have to pay child support for a child who is not his biological child?

I was wondering when this was going to be taken up by the Legislature again. Over the years I have dealt with a few cases where the "father" raised the child or children and then, upon divorce or dissolution of the relationship, found out that his sweet heart may have also been sweet on someone else as well. Because of North Carolina law, none of them ended well due to strict time-lines to challenge paternity.

It would be one thing if the system seemed to treat everyone equally. However, some of these guys have been imprisoned because they felt so overwhelmed at all the prospects that they either stopped paying support, did not know a support action could be taken against them or did the smart thing and tried to represent themselves in court.


Until something comes out of the Legislature, remember that you only have two months to challenge paternity after you have signed the paperwork and one year if there is fraud involved.

New App Automatically Deletes Texts: Tigertext App is new weapon against snooping

An interesting new App [Tigertext] allows for the sender to automatically control how their texts are handled after leaving their phones. The texts are never actually captured by the recipient's phone, so there is no trace on any phone, server or bill. And the texts are automatically deleted after a certain amount of time. This will make electronic discovery very interesting in the coming years.

The article eludes to the App being developed [and/or named] in light of Mr. Woods' experience with having his texts thrown all over the internet.


http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1968233,00.html?hpt=T2

North Carolina protects servicemembers' custodial rights. Vermont is prepared to follow that lead.

All indications are that Vermont is prepared to follow North Carolina and 21 other States' lead and protect the rights of soldiers, Marines, Airmen/women, and Naval personnel from having their custodial rights permanently tampered with simply because they are deployed in service of our Country.

North Carolina revised their General Statutes in 2007 to reflect our State's commitment to deployed troops and their children.

http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/EnactedLegislation/Statutes/HTML/BySection/Chapter_50/GS_50-13.7A.html

Andrew Young's attorneys respond to Hunter's Ex Parte Order

Despite the fact that Rielle Hunter was able to secure an Ex Parte Order with some high-powered attorneys on her side, it appears that the Young's attorneys are no slouches and are fighting the TRO pretty vigorously.

The Original motion, affidavit, Ex Parte Order, and this Response certainly make an interesting read. And a valuable lesson in TRO's and Injunctions.

It will certainly be interesting to find out what the Orange County Judge determines after Friday's hearing, but, as always with this case, it is really sad for the Edwards children and the Hunter-Edwards daughter that their lives will be forever changed by something that, while a component of daily human existence, has become so public and embarrassing.

Judge says alimony can not be based on Doctor's tax returns...

In a shocking decision, a Judge in India ordered a man to pay higher alimony than he wanted to pay. The 'shocking part' being that the man's tax returns did not represent what his actual income was from his medical practice, the court surmised.

Old flames are still rivals

James Cameron and Kathryn Bigelow, number 3 of his 5 former wives, are at odds again. This time around it is over whose movie is going to win an Oscar; his for Avatar, and hers for The Hurt Locker. Despite their professional relationship, onlookers are anxious to see who is going to be King or Queen of this contest. Stay tuned...and remember that success is sometimes the best revenge.

Same Sex Adoption Decision from the Court of Appeals to Be Reviewed by NC Supreme Court

Despite the fact that she lost an anonymous decision of the NC Court of Appeals, Melissa Jarrell has asked for the NC Supreme Court to weigh in on whether an adoption she consented to should be upheld.

Three years ago, when times were good, Melissa wanted the adoption to occur. Now, when times are not so good, it is a sham.

In my opinion, what is a sham is that Melissa is doing what some parents do when they go to Court. Use the children as weapons, pawns, or as sources of power in the disintegration of their relationships. Regardless of gender, orientation, religion, race, etc., children need parent(s) and family(ies) who look out after the children's interests and not after their own.

how tolerant are you...

...in your relationship? Does the good outweigh the bad, barely equalize or overwhelm the good in every way imaginable?

Facebook's influence on relationships...

Interesting article on how Facebook has impacted relationships and how those in a relationship tend to obsess about use and/or friends on their partner's site.

are you an I/you or a we couple?

The difference of whether a couple describes themselves as a "we" or as individuals could be an indication of the quality of your relationship according to researchers at UC-Berkeley.

http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/01/29/couples-with-shared-identity-better-at-conflict-resolution/11056.html

Communication is the key to relationships...bad ones and good ones

So many times the folks I talk to have a terrible time communicating with their ex-spouse, partner or co-parent. It is no surprise that those problems probably existed long before the break-up of the relationship. But those "signs" were ignored during those "great times" and most likely were part of the fun or were "inside jokes" between the couple. Now, however, when times are lean [lean on love, that is], those very issues are or seem insurmountable.

This article is not divorce or marriage specific, but relationships are not born on the date of marriage, they begin long before then and, as the article suggests, they take work and active participation to make them successful.

http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Communication-Skills-How-to-Make-Yourself-Heard?cnn=yes